How to deal with other people’s opinions?

Hi guys,

This week is going to be a very work-loaded week. I have managed to get all tools needed to get my YouTube channel running and on Saturday there will be the first episode uploaded. Any way, I am very excited about this, but at the same time, there is still so much work to be done. I have first episode of tutorial ready, but there are still little bits and pieces to take care of.

All this made me decide to talk about other’s people opinions today. I don’t know, if you have realised, but very often we are getting opinions, we are not asking for. Like, you’ll say to your friend: “oh, I am going to start my own band!” or “I am going to set up my own business!”. And while you are suspecting some sort of support, you are getting: “It will not work” or “You’ll just waste your time”. As I have been blessed with a lot of this kind of opinions, while informing about my YouTube channel, I would like to talk, what to do with them (or at least what I am doing). I have divided this process into stages, so let’s jump right into first of them:

Stage one: Try to understand, why people are saying this

This might sound funny. Why shall I be interested in the reason of someone’s opinion? It is my life and I need to decide about it. That’s of course true. However, understanding reasoning of other people, gives you another point of view. When you are deciding on some new things, usually you are excited and your brain seems to ignore any hardships you might find on your way.

That’s why it is worth it to spend a while to consider other’s opinions and reasoning behind them. Maybe they had some experience with similar activity, or they just can imagine the whole process much better than you do? Maybe they will just open your eyes on things you have to do before starting and you’ll be more prepared, then you would be without knowing it?

The only thing is to make sure, that other’s opinions aren’t base on their priorities. Make sure, that while listening to them, you’ll make sure that this huge disadvantage mentioned by your fiend, is a disadvantage in your eyes also. Remember, that we are all completely different!

Stage two: Figure out your ability

Using what you have found out from other people and what you knew before, now is the time to see, if you can manage it (I am failing in this stage very often, so I think out of my experience, that this is an important one). And what I mean by, is to ask yourself few questions:

  • Do I need to invest any money? Can I afford it at the moment?
  • How much time will I have spend on this each day? Am I able to do so?
  • Do I have all necessary skills? If not, can I get them? And how long it will take?
  • Is there any risk? Am I ready to deal with consequences, in case if I fail?

These questions are quite simple and they don’t require anything from you, except a little time. But remember, it is easier to climb the mountain knowing that you have someone to ensure your safety, than being on your own. So being prepared for any hardships might make your journey much easier and less stressful.

Stage three: Have a plan B

If people are saying, that you are going to waste your time (or sometimes you are considering it too), try to thing about other way, how you can use skills you’ll gain, in case if this idea will not work. Will it be considered as an experience in some kind of job, you wouldn’t mind to perform? Or maybe you have another project in your mind and you can use some of the skills? It will give you a peace of mind and help you focus on your tasks.

Stage four: Make a plan and start moving forward

If you weighted your risk and you are more aware of negative possibilities connected to your project, now it is time to plan everything and start your work. It won’t be done itself 😉

I hope this will help you to make decision and make you be able to figure out which opinions are helpful, but which of them aren’t. If you have any advises on this topic, I will be more than happy to read them in the comment section.

But this is it for today. I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

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Getting rid of the worse habit of mine. New challenge!

Hi guys,

Today, I am going to talk about very important part of self-development, which is getting rid of bad habits and I will take on the new challenge.

As I mentioned in few of my previous posts, habits are a very powerful tools in achieving anything you want. You want to learn something? Make a habit to spend time to master this skill. You want to be stronger? Make habit of exercising every morning. Just simply include it in your routine and before you’ll realise, you will be doing it on autopilot. Without wondering about all excuses.

However, not every habit is good. There are some, which are devastating for us. But before I will tell you about this group, let me tell you, how one of my friend explained me, what habit mean (please note that this is not an official definition):

Habits and addictions are actually same. Bad habit is called an addiction and good addiction is called a habit.

Why I have mentioned that? First I will tell you, that I am writing this post on Saturday and Sunday. Although, it will be published on Monday, I want to keep it as a preparation for war with the worse of my habits, namely: smoking.

This is one of my bad habits, I had a lot of attempts to stop. As I still struggle with it, you can figure out that they were just failures. Sometimes, things you want to get rid of, are being so rooted in your everyday life, that you are reaching for them automatically. This is how it looks like with my smoking. I have been smoking for about eight or nine years, but I have reached amount of 20 to 30 cigarettes a day. I started to smoke so much after beginning of this year, when there were just too many things happening and I couldn’t handle it. However, I really can see an impact of smoking in my body, but in my mental balance, too. I became much weaker, very often I need a break to catch some air, even if I just walk a bit quicker. But what is the worse, I became very prone to getting frustrated. It doesn’t make me blow or anything. But inside I can feel it. My failures from the past, the amount of money, I have to spend each week and finally, this shade of possible diseases I can get from smoking. All this makes me stop right away, but at the same time, there is this voice in my head saying: “You will fail again, don’t waste your time and effort!”.

Well, this is going to change, when you are reading it. This time I just know, I will be able to take control in my life and my schedule won’t be driven by cigarettes breaks. This time, I had done a great research and I know that being aware of symptoms connected to nicotine withdrawal, will help me to overcome them.

So here it is! My first day of not smoking! So far it is not that bad, but I also know that real struggle will start tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed.

I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

P.S. To be more precised, this is first half day of not smoking, as I had three cigarettes left from yesterday. But it is first day of my challenge. If you are interested what tricks I am using to make sure I am not smoking, let me know in the comment section below. They might be useful if you are at the same place as me.

Why all this productivity things, self-development and ideas are so important for me?

Hi guys,

Today’s post is a continuation of my previous post (here is the link, if you are interested), where I introduced you to the way, how I am dealing with my ideas. As my dream is to be able to earn my living by working from home. Moreover I want to build sources of passive income online, so most of my ideas are connected with that.

However, building passive income online is quite a big struggle. There are not too many stories, where you are becoming rich overnight and instead, there is a lot of work going on at the beginning, without any income at all. And, as a passive income seems to be a very convenient option, there are a lot of people who got discouraged and simply gave up before seeing any results at all. This was the reason, why I have started this blog. Just to keep me moving. To have some space, where I can track progress on my goals. But as time passed, I have realised that this is not the way to follow. And I decided to share my thoughts and opinions about things I am reading or just things I knew since very long time, but never had an occasion to think them through.

Switching the way with my blogging, made me realise that building a passive income requires a lot of changes. You need to develop patience and you have to learn how to enjoy the process. After all, you will never know, if this project you are working on at the moment, will ever be successful. But the fact of building passive income itself make you more productive. Just because you can’t just leave your job right away (especially if you don’t have enough savings to survive for some time) and you have to work on it in your free time, when people around are just relaxing.

To be honest, people around can be discouraging as well. You will probably hear a lot of opinions that you are just wasting your time. That nothing is going to work. You have made so much effort already, so where are your results? You might even believe them at some point. But the way, how I am writing my posts at the moment, requires from me a lot of analysing. Wondering about the world, about myself… But it also requires a lot of learning. I just watch some videos and I am getting inspired, so I am trying to go deeper into the topic and learn more.

What is impressive, I had to learn to look around me. Before I was known as a person walking with my head in the clouds. I could pass by the people I know very well and just not even notice them (even if they said “Hi!” to me). At the moment I am watching the world around me. I can see people’s struggles, sadness, happiness and all set of different emotions. I can see their behaviours and learn. Learn about people and the whole society I am living in. I feel that this makes me a better person.

However, I have slipped out of passive income topic. Building it online makes you work a lot from home. You hardly meet any people, you don’t deal with them a lot (I mean, there are some people who you are talking online). You will need to care for your social life yourself. You have to make sure, you are meeting your friends spending quality time with your family, just to simply socialise with the people.

So coming up to the conclusion building the passive income requires a lot of work, which doesn’t show any results on the beginning. You might want to carry on with different sources of your passive income, however I have decided to focus on one at the time and carry on to the next one as soon, as the previous one doesn’t require a lot of work from me any more (or I will just become familiar with it and it will not keep taking a lot of time for me). You might need to invest some money as well (but it depends on the things you are doing). But what is the most important (at least in my opinion), you have to keep learning constantly. Learn about things you are doing (just to become better in them); learn about yourself, to find how to overcome moments of resignations and learn how to stay productive, while everyone around is just relaxing. The other thing I haven’t mentioned yet, your products (whether it is a website, YouTube channel, book, podcast, etc.) should bring some kind of value for people, who are going to use them, either it will be something entertaining, educational or any other.

But what I think is the most important, they have to be unique. And you can ask: How can I make an unique product, if there are already millions of them out there? Everything has been told! And you would be right. However, the important thing is how are you going to deliver your value. And there is a wide field here to experiment, to include your unique personality here and there and just make it stand out of the crowd.

Now you might ask, if it is worth so much effort. Sacrificing evenings out and working a lot of extra hours every day instead (I have even heard that this is a slavery job; I am working like dumb just for free)? Well, for me it does. First of all, learning process is very exciting. Second of all, If I can work harder now and be able to rest after, not worrying about my incomes? I am in!

And what is important, I am making sure, that my projects are about something, what is very interesting for me. So even by working more, I am doing things I love to do any way. Moreover, there are still a lot of things I want to learn, just because I would like to be able to do particular things. So including them into building my passive income is very effective, actually.

And this is it for today’s post. I hope you like it and that it explained you, why I am so interested in self development and productivity topics. Why ideas are so important for me and why I want to make sure that I am not loosing any important one.

If you have any questions about passive income, you can ask them in comment section below. I will answer them either by replying to your comment or writing a next post (if your question requires more explanation). What is important, this blog is not a way to earn any money, it is some kind of journal, where I am keeping my thoughts and I hope that my point of view might help someone. If I will be able to earn some extra money, I will probably use this opportunity, but there it isn’t a source I consider as passive income.

For today, I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

How to manage your ideas?

Hi guys,

Today I would like to talk about new ideas (again 😉 ), as I think they are a crucial part of any kind of creative work. Even if you are the master of sitting and getting your stuff done, you won’t be as productive, if you won’t know what to do, will you? And in this post I have already mentioned, that having a lot of ideas might be quite hard. New things popping up in your mind can disturb you quite effectively. You might get this feeling of first excitement and want to leave whatever you are up to at the moment and start working on this great and the best new idea. However, if you are getting these new ideas too frequently, you will be left with huge amount of projects which have been started, but they are waiting on your to-do list to get them done.

I can’t remember in which of my post I have mentioned about working on one and only one project at the time, but I think I haven’t mentioned what I am doing with these new ideas I have (yeah, at least in my case, my brain mastered forgetting them in very short time). Very often I don’t even have time to think about them (as I am working on only one project, I can’t distract myself with considering pros and cons of the next one). But at the same time, when I actually finish whatever I am working on, guess what? I can’t come with any new idea for some time and I don’t remember my previous ones (or I remember just few of them, which I can’t start right away, because of tools I need, or lack of skills).

So some time ago I came up with the idea, how to solve this problem (well, to be more precised, I found it on the internet here 😉 ; however, the material is in polish and this method is used there to sort out tasks, not ideas). And the way to solve it, is just having a list with all ideas you have. Does it mean that you have to sit and spend two hours on working on them? Not necessary. The point of this method is, that you need to find any small notebook, or even one sheet of a paper (probably your phone will do very well, too), which you will be carrying with you and write each idea visiting your mind (they are trying to be very tricky, as they are coming in the most unexpected moment). So as soon as you feel that this is it! just write it down without considering anything about it and just leave it on the list for a time being (out of topic, for a time being is probably my favourite saying in English; I have no idea why 😉 ).

As soon as you’ll get your current project done, you will have a list of ideas, and you can always look into it and thing about each of them. At this moment, you are not working on anything, so you can allow yourself to just determine, if an idea you had some time ago still seems to be a good idea. If not, you just remove it from your list. At the end of the process you will be left with a list of potentially good ideas and you need to pick one, which you feel like working on at the moment.

I think, this is going to work great for people, who are working on their own products, too. You can write all ideas along the time and when you get one done, you can pick the next one and start working on it. This way, you might be sure that you are not going to lose any of them and, if after some time you’ll decide, that this particular idea is not as good as it seemed at the beginning, you can just remove it from the list.

As you can see, it isn’t a hard process, but it happened to be life-saving for me. I have in plan to include in my thing one more tip, which I came across in one of the podcasts I am listening when I have a time (mostly when I can’t do any other work; for example, when I am commuting, cooking, cleaning, etc.; so in reality it is huge amount of time each day). Although it is very interesting, I will share it, when I will adapt it in my planning process, so I will be able to share my opinion on this topic, too.

And this is it for my today’s post. If you have some other tips how to manage your ideas, I will be delighted to read about them in the comment section below.

For now, I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

Five struggles I encountered being a blogger

Hi guys,

While starting to write today’s post, I had no idea what shall I write about. I literally couldn’t think about anything. Just like my brain got blanked out for some reason. So I’ve decided to simply write about struggles connected to having a blog. I have written a post about changes taking place in my life since I have this blog. However, in What have changed in more than one year of blogging? post, I focused on positive things. I haven’t written about struggles, probably most of the bloggers needs to face on their way (of course, as there are so many bloggers out there, they are not impossible to overcome). So let’s get right into it:

Keeping up with a schedule

This is something, I personally struggle with a lot. There are so many unexpected events in everyday life, that sometimes it is very hard to keep with it. Sometimes, it is so simple think, like you know you are not going to be able to post at certain time, so you are preparing post in advance, getting it ready to go and… forget to schedule it (this happen to me too often). There are also health related or family related things, you usually can’t predict. But sometimes you just can’t make yourself to actually sit and write this post which you’ve planned and thought through for a millionth time.

And sometimes it is another reason, which leads us to next point:

Lack of ideas

Sometimes we are ready sitting by the computer, but we don’t have an idea what we want to talk about. There might be different reason for that, like being tired or just sick. But sometimes it does happen without any reason. Just because it happens and this is the case, when it is relatively hard to overcome this. Simple, when you don’t have an idea, you can always write about something random and deliver a post without particular meaning or message, but a lot of bloggers cares about the quality of their post. So this is getting even harder.

Everyday’s life

This might seem weird, but a lot of us has a full-time job, family to look after, home to take care of, and many more. Sometimes it might be just hard to squeeze writing a post into an regular schedule (yeah, some people seem to forget about it, but bloggers are a regular people, with more or less hectic life; and they have to keep up with everything).

This leads us to the next point:

Time management

I’ve realised this because of starting my blog. To be able to post regularly, you have master time management, especially, if you have many other things to look after. Whether your posts are short or long, require your research or not, you need to have a time to work on them. You need to find topic, think it through and finally write it. But this is not all. After that you need to proof read it, make sure all settings are set as you want them to be, choose featured photo. And even though, all this action take only few minutes (except of writing and proof reading), in total you can get quite big amount of time and you need to put it somewhere in your schedule. And here good time management comes in handy.

You are the boss

As well it sounds, this is the struggle not only bloggers are coming across, but generally all those, who work for one selves. There is no one above you, to tell you that you should write a post, there are no consequences if you will not write. So to keep up, you have to find a motivation within yourself. You have to decide, where and when you are going to do. But what is more important: what are you going to write. And especially on the beginning, when almost no one is reading your posts, it might be a very hard task. There will be days, when you will doubt, if there is any point to keep doing it. And to overcome them, you need to convenience yourself. There wouldn’t be anyone to do this for you.

These are all struggles I wanted to share with you. They might be hard for some to overcome, for the others easy. However, no matter to which of these groups you are falling, there is one weapon helping you all the way. And this weapon is your passion. If you are passionate about your topic and process of writing itself is something you love, it will be much easier to keep going.

This is it for today’s post. I hope you like it. And if you are a blogger and you found some other challenges connected with what you do, you can share it in the comment section. I will be pleased to read them.

For now, I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

Trespass the fence of your fear to gain creativity

Hi guys,

Today, before I jump into the content, I will say that I am just amazing. I have prepared this post on Tuesday and scheduled it for Wednesday (at least this is what I believed). But as soon as I opened a wordpress app, I have realised that in reality, I have scheduled it for today. So here it is, again late.

However, today’s topic came out of nowhere. I have been thinking, how it is possible, that some people seem to be natural in their talent, it almost looks like that they have been born and they already knew how to be good at something, while others need years and years to bring the same skill to similar level. As it isn’t topic of this subject, I will tell you about my conlusion in the next post. Today, I would like to focus on creativity. Have you ever wonder, why some people are so open, always come out with great ideas, their art work stands out (not only because of their talent, but the way how they presented the topic)? While on the other hand, some people seem to just copy everyone around, without having anything original to show?

Propably, you would call the first group creative, but why the other are not? What characteristic you need to have, to be creative? Or maybe, it is a genes work and you can not do anything about it?

I have been thinking about it since quite long time. Myself, I struggle with creativity quite often. But what I have realised, my struggle is not to have an idea, but to accept any of them. Propably, it doesn’t make sense now, but let me explain it further:

When I am trying to brainstorm any problem (if it is about my personal projects, I do this on my own), I usually have a lot of ideas how to solve it. However, some of them are being rejected, before I (at least!) looked closer at them and analysed them. Simply, I am just ignoring them and forget almost right away.

When I realised this process taking place in my mind, I started to wonder why I am doing this. I mean, I complain very often about my lack of creativity, but when I have ideas, I am not even trying to analyse them. And I came to very interesting conclusion, when I figure out, what creativity means.

For me, to come out with a good idea, you need to reveal a part of yourself. The ability of sneaking your way into things that already exist, delivering it in your way – this is what creativity is. Wheather you are an artist, you try to create a website, or try to set up a business, which will be standing out from many other similar businesses; you have to come up with something, what haven’t been done before. And here is the problem. That means, that this part of your personality or past will be exposed to everyone. In my case, it cause a fear. Eventhough, I am not aware of it. But in the back of my head, I am predicting all judgements I would hear, if I would just get it into the real world: “what a stupid idea!”; “how she could think, that this is going to work?”; “there is not even slight chance of a success!”; and so on. All this can make me put my head down and just back up. It is easier, isn’t it?

Well, not always. I have heard a lot stories of people on their death bed. They almost never regretted what they did, but almost always did regret things, they didn’t do. All these things, they were lacking courage to achieve. They wish, they haven’t pay as much attention to other people’s opinion and just live their life instead.

I am the person, who has a lot of ideas in my head, some of them might not be good. But I will never know, if I will not try them. However, I am not spending enough time, to get them ready. I still keep starting new projects, before the previous one are finished and I am ending up with nothing. Because, what if people don’t like, what I am doing? What, if they will laugh and keep pointing fingers at me?

But what is the funniest thing in all that? Reasonable part of me knows, that nothing like this is going to happen. And even if it would, I wouldn’t care as much propably. So the only thing, what could propably happen, is just a failure. Which propably will be forgotten by everyone (including myself) quite soon.

And this part of you, which you would let out with your creative way of doing things, will propably not be spotted by anyone. Just because random people don’t know you well enough, to determine what comes from your personal experiences and what have been coloured a bit, to make it more atractive. They know almost nothing about your emotions, about this small part of your soul, you are exposing to them. They can see it, but they won’t be knowing, that you did this because this and this happened. They will just appreciate it or not, but as a whole only. Not each piece of it, as they will not analyse it as deeply.

And even if your project fails, you will learn something new about yourself. And what is more important, you will be able to move to the next project, without thoughts in your head wondering: “What, if I would tried that one?”. You will just know, it wouldn’t work. And by doing this, you will teach yourself to open more. To let your creativity to be free and keep yourself motivated (if you are not afraid of surreal consequences, it will be easier for you, to do what you love).

And with this thought, I am going to finish this post. I hope you like it and, as always, I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

What can we learn from five-year-old

Hi guys,

In today’s post I am going to leave subject of self-awareness for a while (at least till the moment, when I will have some results to share with you). However, at the moment I am enjoying three days off in my work. As I have quite a lot of medical things to sort out and university related tasks, which are going to get over due soon, I have decided to take short holiday. And that makes me excited a lot. I know, I have been desperately wanting to come back to work after my dehydration thing (yeah, and how you can understand a women 😉 ), but as I mentioned, I think the reason for that was just being forced to take off.

I am also planning to get as much work on my channel as I possibly can (I have ordered microphone already and I hope that it will arrive till Monday), so I keep my fingers crossed that I will be able to get it going by the end of the next week. Of course I will share here the results of my hours and hours of work and I hope it was worthed so much effort.

Other than that, there is so much things going on next week and I am looking forward for it to come. One of the things is my cousin’s son birthday. He is going to be 5 on Thursday and he is so amazing human being. Every time I talk to him, I am learning something new. His innocence and straight-forwardness (I hope this word actually exist and I am not making it up) make me realise so much about my adult life.

So today, I have decided to share some stories, where my nephew play a main part in and I’ll explain you what have I lernt from these events.

Honesty

This story have taken place one and a half year ago on Christmas Eve. But before I will jump into the story, I am going to tell you something about polish tradition (and as far as I know, at least in UK, Christmas celebration is very different than in my back home). So in Poland the very special event is a Christmas Eve, to be more detailed, Christmas Eve’s supper. According to the tradition, people start all celebrations, when first star appear on the sky. There is huge excitement among the children, who usually are in charge of spotting it, while adults are trying to take care of last bits of pieces, to make the whole evening perfect (and there is a lot to do, as polish tradition includes twelve meals for Christmas Eve’s supper; what usually is interesting for people, who I am talking to, is that each participant have to (at least) try each of them, no matter how full she or he is or if this is something they like or not; the only exception are alergies and food intollerances). This day everyone is wearing elegant clothes, etc. So that year we were celebrating in my aunties home and me and my cousin decided to meet in her home before, get ready there and go together. When I was ready, I asked her if I look ok, she confirmed. “What do you think, Darek?”. And his answer made me laugh, as he said: “This dress makes you look fat”.

And this made my cousin mad. She started to appologise and tried to explain him, that it isn’t right to say that. However, I think, he had full right to tell this (he could say it in more delicate way, but as a child he wouldn’t know how to do it). This is something what annoyes me about adult. First of all, people who ask for opinion, but they want to hear only good things. And second of all, people asked for opinion, who lie to you, just because they don’t want to hurt you. I think this second one comes out of first, as people came across someone, who blasted at them, when they said what they think and they just want to keep their opinion in the future. Moreover, parents who are getting angry at their children, when they are saying what they think. As a result, growing up makes us less honest after each situation of this kind.

So what I have learnt from this situation, is to be honest and say what you think; and the other thing is to have distance to myself (if I ask for opinion, I prefer to hear opinion, not what I would like to hear).

Innocence

This story is much shorter than the previous one. So what have happened at one time when I was visiting them, was that Darek grabbed my bag and threw all the stuff on the floor. I have to admit, that I have gotten mad at first. But when I’ve asked him, why he did this, he answered that his mum is always doing this after their walk, so it is not a big deal.

Children are innocent by default, as they haven’t got chance to learn how to be bad, yet. They make mistakes and sometimes are getting on other people’s nerves, however they don’t do this intentionally (at least in most of cases). They are just copying people’s behaviour, these who are around them. How they would learn otherwise? They don’t know all written and unwritten rules playing a huge part in adult’s world.

This taught me to be understanding, as we can hurt the person, who didn’t have an intention to do anything wrong. The best way is to talk first 😉 at least you will know that blasting at them is a right thing 😉

Curiousity

This is propably the best one. Children are just striving to learn about the world. They keep asking questions, and they won’t stop till they fully understand what they want to know. How I see it with my nephew? Every time when I am doing something, Darek keeps asking questions: what are you doing? Why are you doing this? Why can’t you do this this or that way?

Children don’t know about the rules you need to follow, if you want to leave in society. They don’t worry about getting knowledge and skills for their future job, yet. They just strive to get knowledge just for the sake of… having knowledge. Simple as that. But what is even more amazing, they don’t just want to know, they want to understand, too. And this is ability that a lot of us, adults, are missing.

These are all things I am going to mention today, eventhough there are many more. I am sure, if you are lucky to spend time with children, you can find many of them by yourself.

For today, I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

P.S. Today’s post is one day late, but since tomorrow, I am going to go back to regular schedule (Monday, Wednesday and Friday). I hope you liked today’s post and I will be happy to read, if you can think of any other things to learn from the children.

What next, if we are self-aware?

Hi guys,

As you might have realised, I became interested in the topic of self-awareness recently. At the end of the proccess, I would like to understand as much about myself, as I possibly can. I am a kind of person, who sometimes make decesion being influenced by emotions. And eventhough I was regretting it after, I couldn’t change it. Most of the time, I was not aware why I am doing it. It was just happening.

Many times I’ve heard from other people, that I behave like a spoiled child. I just wasn’t able to control some of my reactions. Especially, when someone has driven me mad. I would go on and on on a subject, till my anger disapeared and I could say my sorry. At that moments I had seriously felt like a child, the only difference was that this time no one asked me to say sorry, I just knew I went over board and this is what I should do.

And eventhough it isn’t happening to often (it is quite hard to drive me mad, luckily), but these rare events make me feel really bad about myself. So I have decided to make notes about everything connected to this situation: my emotions, feelings, even weather and my general well-being. The point of it was to figure out, what makes me loose control and blast without any particular reason (seriously, situations when it happened wasn’t as important as I used to think when I was hurting people around).

And as I mentioned before, I used to act being influenced by emotions. I think, this is something most of us is dealing with. Even if only occasionally, it is still quite embarassing, when it happens. So this is the reason, why I want to eliminate this kind of behaviours from my life. Just to be able to get over them every time, when they decide to hit.

At the moment, I am conducting a research on how to fight with them. And as soon, as I will find some ideas, I am going to share them with you.

Of course, proccess of learning about myself isn’t done. There are still many things I want to change. However, I will deal with one change at the time.

Today’s post is a short one, but I hope you enjoyed it any way. I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

What have changed in more than one year of blogging?

Hi guys,

Mondays became my favourite days recently. I usually have so much to do, but all my tasks for the day make me really excited. I had to delay my YouTube channel, as it turnes out that there are a lot of noises in the background, so it would be quite annoying to watch (yeah, I’ve got so excited, that I didn’t think about listening it till last moment). However, it doesn’t mean that I have stopped working on it. While I am saving money to buy a proper microphone, I am preparing episodes, so after I can add a voiceover and they will be ready. It will hopefully help me, in case of any kind of emergency happening in my life, after it will start. They will be just ready to upload. And YouTube is a first task for me for Monday.

I also write a post on Monday, which literally make my day. I wouldn’t even suspect it, when I first started. I had a feeling that I will just write few post and I will get bored of it. However, I have been posting for more than one year! Of course, there were times, when I haven’t posted anything for a long time, but mostly it was caused by some emergency (like my recent visit to the hospital).

So today, I would like to share with you, what have changed in my life, since mymotivation.blog exists.

Let’s move right into the content.

I became more organised and stopped procrastinate as much

It might sound funny. How in the world one website might make you more organised? And how it influences your procrastination? I am not sure, if I will be able to explain it, but having a posts schedule made me keep planning all other tasks around my posts. Not only that, it helped me to actualy stick to this plan (yeah, I am not perfect; I have worse days too, but most of the time it is true). The reason for this is that I feel very bad, when I will not make it on time with my new post. Even if sometimes, there is not even one person reading it, it is so fun to actualy write something and be able to see it on my own website. And there is such rewarding feeling, when I can manage to do it on time. But to be able to keep it up, I have to make sure that other tasks are done, too. First of all, tasks have a magical power (seriously!). One day you are adding them to your to-do list, with the feeling that you still have a lot of time to get it done, while next time when you see them on the list, they are so close to the due date, that you have no idea what to do to be on time. So if I will let more than one task become urgent (or sometimes one time consuming is enough), I will be propably forced to put all other tasks aside and focus on what needs to be done now. And mostly in this situation, my blog post used to be late or left till other things were accomplished.

I have progressed in planning bigger projects

This is a very important one for me. Although I haven’t became a master yet (what you can see on the example of my YouTube channel), I became much better. Before, I used to plan my projects by starting planning job. This is what have happen with this blog. I have started posting, without any idea what or how I am going to keep up. For some of you (especially more experienced bloggers) my blog might be something, what does not really make any sense. I am posting since more than one year and it is very hard to find any focus of this blog. Sometimes I have this feeling too. However, this is my first serious project; requiring commitment, a lot of creativity to find an inspiration for a topic of each post. And in this project I have made a lot of mistakes, which are very precious lessons for the future. The most important of them, is to try to imagine the whole proccess, before you go for it. Visualise all steps you need to take to do, whatever you are trying to do. And after: do your research! This is something what I couldn’t figure out. That it is worthed to hear opinion of more experienced people, find out what kind of mistakes they’ve made and what advises they have (there are tons of blog post’s and YouTube videos about almost everything) and after that sit and plan your steps, try to figure out, what kind of obstacles you might find on the way and how you want to deal with them.

This leads to the next point:

I have learnt a lot about myself

This might be quite weird as well, but sharing your thoughts and feelings is giving you a lot of materials to come back to. Just reading my old posts makes me realise what shall I change in myself and let me understand better my thinking proccesses. And believe me or not, but sometimes, when I am reading my old posts, I am finding so many things about myself, that would annoy me in the other person. But it also gave me an opportunity to see, how much I have already changed during this time. And I believe, this is something usefull to know about yourself.

My English improved

This might be a bit unbelievable for some, as I still have a lot to do with my English skills. However, personaly I can see a difference already. First of all, writing comes much easier to me. On the beginning of my journey I had to check up a lot of words, which I needed to express my thoughts. Now it does happen occasionaly. And eventhough I know, I still make a lot spelling mistakes, maybe sometimes I am missusing words, however I am already proud of my progress (especially, that wordpress app on the phone doesn’t highlight spelling mistakes). There is also one more aspect of writting in the language which is not your native one. And what I want to talk about, is fear. When I was starting, I was anxious that people will start pointing my mistakes in negative way (I wouldn’t mind pointing them for learning purpose), call me stupid, illiteratare, etc. And it was not only on the blog. Before I would be scared to send any message to my boss, or friends because there might be some mistake. But I have understood, that people don’t care, at least as long as they are able to understand your point. So if you are in similar situation like me, I would advise you to ignore other people’s opinion and start writting as much as you can, because this is the best way to actually improve your writting.

I found place, where I can just throw all my thoughts out of my head

This is a good one, too. This blog became a place, where I can just write everything, what is in my head. My observations, opinions, feelings, frustrations, etc. This leaves my head so light, give me some place for new ideas. Journal would propably do same work, however keeping up with the journal never happen to me. So this is a perfect solution.

And these are all things, which have changed in my life (at least these, which I am aware of at the moment). I hoped you have enjoyed it and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

Forbidden friut tastes the best

Hi guys,

Today is a third day since I have returned to work. And I have mixed feelings about it. First of all, I hate being out of work doing nothing. I know that health is the most important (that is the reason, why I haven’t do anything; usually, I tend to break doctor’s rules). However, last few days, my head felt very heavy, eventhough I slept much more than usually. And I felt generally tired. As my employer believed me that I was unable to work (he visited me in hospital), he did not need to see my doctor’s leave and as I feel much better than yesterday, I’ve decided to forget that I can stay at home till end of the week.

What I’ve realised recently, staying at home on doctor’s leave makes me feel much more unwell, than I actually am. Maybe it is just a think, that I sleep a lot, but simply, I don’t like it. I feel like I am not able to do anything. Like nothing has sense. What I have learnt, returning to work makes me feel better (any way, my boss doesn’t let me do too hard work straight after returning back; this actually cause my mixed feelings).

There is one saying in polish (and I am not sure, if it exists only in polish language; you can let me know in comment section, if in your country you have it too), which goes: “Forbidden fruit tastes the best”. That means that if you shouldn’t be doing something, you will do it. Just because it is forbidden. I can’t explain, why it happens this way, but when I think about it closely, it really does happen to me quite often.

Since I was a child, I remember that things, my parents asked me not to do, always seemed more attractive. I think,6 it was some kind of adrenaline. You know, this voice in my head: “What if I will get caught?”. Or maybe it was just a need of independence? Whatever it was, it was worthed breaking rules. This feeling, that: “Hey! I did it and I am still ok!”.

However, things being forbidden very often are some kind of a hazard for our health or safety. Propably this is a reason, why we are not supposed to do them. Similar is with my work.

I have to admit that I like my job in general. But there are some aspects of it making me not want to go there. Every here and then I just pray for few days off. A little time to rest. However, any time I am on a doctor leave, I can’t wait to go to work. There is some force out there pushing me and staying at home makes me feel worse. And this time I’ve started wondering, why this is happening. Does it mean that I am a workaholic? Or maybe it is kind of my forbidden fruit?

I came to a conclusion, that it must be the second one. This kind of thing, when I don’t really want to do something and I need a break, but because it is a forced break, I am getting frustrated about it. Does it sound weird? For me it does, eventhough I am guilty of it. And as I am thinking about it more, I am realising that this is not a first time when I am doing it.

Ok, but why am I actually thinking about it? It is just happening, isn’t it? Well, I believe that if we want to take real control over our life, we need to understand what causes our behaviours. As long as we are not aware of them, we can’t really prevent them. And on the other side, if there is some behaviour, we want to incorporate in our life more, we should determine what needs to happen to make us behave this particular way.

And I believe that self-awareness is a neccessary tool in self-development. How can you change something, if you don’t know what is going on? It is like if you would go to doctor with a headache and he would give you random medicines without figuring out what is the problem. This would be weird, wouldn’t it?

That’s the reason why I think, that first thing to sort any problem, is to figure out what causes it. If you can prevent it, you can stop this problem to occur again. Or, if it is about behaviours, better understanding of yourself will improve the control you have over your emotions and will help you to make more reasonable decisions in the future and give you chance to think them through before, instead of acting afected by emotions.

And with this thought, I am going to end this post. Have a productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria