How to set goals to make them happen?

Hi guys,

Being a person, it is normal that we have something we try to achieve. Our goals might be small and not complicated at all, but they can seem like a trip to the moon too. The second group of goals is the one where a lot of things never happens. Often we don’t even try to get closer, as we are just sure that we will not be able to get there.

Today, I will try to explain to you how to make these goals realistic in our heads and how to set them, so we are actually getting closer to achieving them.

As an example, I will make buying a home. I feel like many of us might dream about it and at the same time, it might seem like something impossible to do. We might think that we earn too less or that our credit score is so low. Or whatever else the reason is. I also think, that buying a home is quite a complicated task itself, which makes it a great example to explain it. It is also one of my goals, so I went through these steps myself, which makes it much easier for me to talk about.

So with setting such a big task, the best thing is to go from general to specific. In that case, our goal will be just to buy a home. It is quite straightforward. Not much to explain.

Next step is a bit more complicated. Here you need to come out with all the things you think must happen. You don’t have to think about the order at this point, just write everything that comes to your mind. It could be something like: ‘I need to find a property’, ‘I need to save my deposit money’, ‘I need to get a mortgage’… You can come with as many things as you can. But let’s say you came up just with these three.

The third step is to put your list in the right order. I mean, you will probably not look for a property to buy, if you still haven’t got any savings for a deposit. It would be pretty much waste of time, as till you’ll save enough your dream property might be bought by someone else. On the other hand, you will not get a mortgage, if you haven’t found a home and you will not be able to buy a home if you will not get a mortgage. That makes these steps on the same level.

Having this done, you need to take your first thing from your list and analyse it properly. You can make a sublist to decide where you can get this extra money from. Just come up with as many ideas as you can. It can be something like finding an extra job, reducing going out for dinner, selling all unnecessary stuff, or whatever fits your situation. After take the next thing and also make a list of what has to happen or if it is a simple task, just write all your options to achieve it. And when you’ll get point go through your list and see which of these simple tasks you can start working on now. You might start saving money towards a deposit, you could also try to improve your credit score if it is low, maybe you could find an additional source of income to speed the things up.

As you’ll get this first steps almost done, start working on all next steps you can think of. Let’s say you already have a fair sum of money saved, so you can start looking on properties within your budget or see how much more will you need for the property, which is more expensive. You can start talking to banks to find out how much they can borrow you and what you can do to improve the deal you’ll get from them. All this will depend on the steps you will come up with on the beginning.

But to sum up, the main thing is to split a huge goal into as small tasks as you only can. And keep getting them done one by one. The other important thing is to review your tasks from time to time. Maybe you found out that you will need some insurance, or you’ll have to do some other things you couldn’t know when you were just dreaming, but you found out on the way?

I hope this post was helpful and that you enjoyed reading it. I wish you a very productive day and I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

Goals? But what are they?

Hi guys,

Today’s post is going to be about goals. I think, having goals is very important, as it gives purpose to your life. But goals aren’t all the same. In fact, there are no two goals, which you can say, they are same.

Let’s take for example two people wanting to have £100 000 on their account by the end of the year. And you might say: “Their goals are same”. But goals are much more complicated than just name. They have a story behind them and their purpose purpose.

Let’s stick to the example above. We can’t say that having £100 000 is their goal on it’s own. For one person this amount might be the savings for the worse time, for other it can be necessary to pay for a treatment of family member, another might need it to prove his or her status. And these are only some of possibilities. There are much more out there. Propably, if you have similar goal in your life, you might want to use it in completely different way.

Similarly, each of them might be influenced by different feeling. There will be people, who will be frustrated, because at the moment they are struggling to pay their bills; other might became responsible for the other life, as they became a new parent, and they want everything what’s the best for their child; and other might be just jealous, because their neighbour has £99 999 on their account, so they need at least £1 more (I know such people, even if before I thought that they don’t exist – well, they do).

But to achieve any goal, you need to have strong believes driving you towards success. No matter, why you want to achieve particular thing, if your reason is very important for you, there is great chance that you will eventually get there. No matter what other people will say, how tired you will be. Deep inside your heart you will know that this is what you are suppose to do.

Long time ago I had a friend. Both of us were a bit different then rest of our colleagues, so we became very close. She was doing very well in school. She never went out, if her homework wasn’t done; if we had an exam within next few days, she wouldn’t even pick up her phone (eventhough she new the subject better than our teacher). Most of the people thought that she is just very ambitious, however the truth was that she wanted to be the best for her dad. He suffered from cancer and she wanted to make sure that in case if something will go wrong, he would die being calm about her. She just wanted to reasure him, that she will manage, no matter what. That even if he wouldn’t be able to be with them, she is responsible enough to take care for the family. At that time, (we were 13 or maybe 14) in her mind, this was the way to prove all this.

One day, before I knew the reason, I’ve told her that she is lucky, because she loves to learn and she can actually motivate herself to do it. She answered that she hate studying.

Even after hearing her reasoning, I couldn’t understand her. I was learning for myself and very often it was hard for me to grab a book and study. Even if I loved (actualt, I stll love) studying. She was doing it for her father and she was doing very well (I could even say: perfect). And it wasn’t fear of punishment to make her do this. All this was just blowing my mind at that point.

However, no matter that no one understood it. For her it was so strong feeling that nothing could stop her. She could stay awake at night, to make sure everything is perfectly done (I mean, can you imagine yourself doing this at the age of 14? That time I was hoping that someone will do everything for me 😉 and I will be able to keep rsdting till end of my life 😉 ).

So this is what goals are about. They are not just things we want to do. They are a result of our experiences, feelings and ambitions. I even think that they are always proving something. Sometimes we are just proving to ourself that we can do particular thing, the other time we want to prove it to the whole world. That’s why goals are very special (at least in some way).

Moreover, they are defining who we are. They make us wake up in the morning and follow the path towards them. Whether it’s easy or extremely hard, we are just moving there. In our own speed, trying to face all difficulties. And that makes us special, shows our personality (even if only to ourselves). We are getting upset, when we are failing; sometimes we just give up, but if we strongly believe in our goal, we will get up after each failure. Retaking this way (very often very hard way), just because we know what is waiting for us at the end of it, make us unbreakable in some meaning. And for us, it is one of the most important thing, whether it’s easy life for our child; pride of being better than our neighbour; or just our own contentment. For us, this is all waht does matter.

This is all for today’s post. I wish you very productive day and I hope that all goals you did set or will set in the future will be the ones, you just won’t give up on. And I’ll see you in my next post.

Daria

P.S. I will not include my thoughts and experiences connected to my challenge today. I’ve decided, that for next 4 Sundays I will just publish an extra post, where I will tell you all about the whole week. I am making notes on the daily basis (just to make sure I will learn as much about myself, as I possibly can during this challenge) and I will use these notes to tell you how whole my week went. In much more details, than I would be able to describe it at the end of the regular post.